Tuesday 21 April 2009

Andy Burnham loses his homework

Oh bless. Poor wee mite. Little Andy Burnham (can you imagine 'Billy' Gladstone or 'Benny' Disraeli?) has left some TOP SECRET - oh, all right, Restricted (ie everyone has a copy) - papers on a train, in a forlorn attempt to join the cool gang. Unfortunately, Jacqui Smith has just called him a spacker and nicked his lunch money. Again.

He's really, really sorry, though, and - oh bless him again - he's ordered a departmental review of security.

Next week, Mandelson shoots Derek Draper in the head, and then apologises unreservedly and orders a departmental review of fire-arm usage in BERR.

7 comments:

Ace Starburst said...

I can imagine "Maggie" Thatcher and
"Tony" Blair. Even "Jim" Callaghan - did I ever mention that his granddaughter and I .... oh never mind

dNo said...

Strange that Jonny finds it strange that its Andy. Assume this will be renamed the Jonathon Mac Place of Double Standards before the weekend?
Not sure Ace Starburst however is a name that will be gracing the top trough of politics soon. Recommend changing it to Aceman, Acester or something more formal like Stanley.

Jonny Mac said...

Ah, but dNo, tragically for the UK I am not a Cabinet Minister.

I suggest Colin Starburst.

Ace Starburst said...

No, I've been Ace Starburst for years now, and that's the way it's staying.

dNo said...

Jonny,
Mores the pity you are not a cabinet minister. I do wish you would get yourself elected. Will be straight down the News of the World with "JM took my virginity (gently yet assuredly) on Marx's grave" story, or something similar...

dNo said...

On a semi related note... no doubt Burnham is a twat... but listened to James Purnell on the radio yesterday defending the budget, just a series of infuriatingly puerile comments about how the "tories wouldn't be brave enough to deal with the recession" which was complete tosh. The man was an embarrassment. I almost miss John Prescott and Dr Reid... where are the Robin Cook and Roy Hattersley statesmen... I cant take any more of this Burnham / Balls / Purnell / Milliband bunch. They are not ready to leave kindergarten, let alone run it.

Jonny Mac said...

'Dr' Reid? That came out of left field, dNo.